Up until this point, I have never touched on the topic of the epidemic of gay teen suicides that have been sprouting up over the last couple of years. I am not proud of this, but I have a hard time approaching such heavy subject matter, so I usually just don't. There is so much that simply cannot be said, and there is so much risk in coming off as insincere, and my fear gets the best of me.
Then, this morning, I read the news on Towleroad that Jadin Bell from La Grande, Oregon died yesterday, and I felt like it was time for me to talk. In you're not in the know, Bell was a 15-year-old gay boy who, like many, experienced bullying. Two weeks ago, he attempted to hang himself from a playground structure at an elementary school. He was hospitalized and put on life support until about a week ago.
I wish that there were better ways to stop these children from taking their lives, because every time I see their photos in the news they're just oozing potential and you can tell that they could have gone so far. I know that the Trevor Project and the It Gets Better Project are excellent resources that have inspired so many young queers and saved so many lives, but if you aren't willing to seek out their help there isn't much that they can do.
What upsets me the most in these situations is this: when this kind of article gets posted on any of the LGBT blogs, the comments sections overflow with words of sympathy and condolences and woe from all of the readers. But just a little further down the page, you'll find the same people spewing the same kind of hatred that drove these children to their death at the more grown-up gays who also manage to make the news. Why is this okay? Where do we draw the line between what kind of gay is bully-able and what isn't? Even from another gay person, it is still bullying.
I'm not saying that I have the cleanest record either, but even if I do have something negative to say, I do my best to keep it constructive. Age or level of success shouldn't determine the amount of respect we show our fellow queer kind if we truly want to achieve equality.
I wish that there were better ways to stop these children from taking their lives, because every time I see their photos in the news they're just oozing potential and you can tell that they could have gone so far. I know that the Trevor Project and the It Gets Better Project are excellent resources that have inspired so many young queers and saved so many lives, but if you aren't willing to seek out their help there isn't much that they can do.
What upsets me the most in these situations is this: when this kind of article gets posted on any of the LGBT blogs, the comments sections overflow with words of sympathy and condolences and woe from all of the readers. But just a little further down the page, you'll find the same people spewing the same kind of hatred that drove these children to their death at the more grown-up gays who also manage to make the news. Why is this okay? Where do we draw the line between what kind of gay is bully-able and what isn't? Even from another gay person, it is still bullying.
I'm not saying that I have the cleanest record either, but even if I do have something negative to say, I do my best to keep it constructive. Age or level of success shouldn't determine the amount of respect we show our fellow queer kind if we truly want to achieve equality.
This is really very poignant. It is tragic, but we all need to be honest about the part we play.
ReplyDeleteTotally agree! Let's love eachother a bit more and everyone might feel a little bit more welcome... especially the newbies.
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