"Traditional" is Tragic

Yesterday I was having a conversation with a friend about past relationships and dating and all of that sort of rot. He was telling me how a past partner of his had very traditionally heterosexual ideas about relationships. I knew exactly what he meant, and it wasn't the first time I'd heard relationship styles explained that way, but it occurred to me then how strange it feels to say that straight people and queer people do relationships differently, because I don't think they necessarily do.

What I mean here is that the typical "straight" relationship style involves strict monogamy, and in most cases, pretending that no other person in the world is attractive. The typical "gay" relationship is open and involves plenty of sex with other partners. In a hostile scenario, opposing sides might say that straight relationships are boring and unrealistic, and that gay relationships aren't sincere or aren't focused enough on love. (Again, this is the stereotype, not my own personal belief.)

The case is similar with the subject of marriage. Since the dawn of the marriage equality movement, there has always been a smaller portion of the LGBT folk who have believed that marriage was "something that straight people do", or think that we should have something equal to marriage, but with a different name. But why call it something different if it means the same thing?

Based on my own experiences, which I dare say are pretty extensive in the sex and relationships department, I don't see fairness in attributing one kind of relationship to a specific group of people. I have interacted with plenty of gay couples and hopefuls who strongly believed in the strict monogamous path. Likewise, the number of straight couples practicing less traditional relationship styles is ever growing. Eventually the mix is going to be so evenly split that we won't be able to attribute one relationship stereotype to one sexual orientation.

My point is, whether you are straight, gay, lesbian, bi, queer, etc., never feel like you are obligated to follow one particular path. Be open if you want. Be monogamous if you want. There may be one style that works for you, or it may change depending on your partner(s). Don't let anyone else dictate how you date. Love is meant to make you happy, so grant yourself that freedom.